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Sunday, March 27, 2016

I got pregnant to have a baby....

Recently I have been seeing more and more people announcing they are pregnant, which naturally brings out the frustration of more and more people who are experiencing the unfortunate trial of infertility.


I cannot possibly imagine what it might be like to take test after test and that big fat negative staring you in the face, like its mocking you. The feeling of "this is the month" only to be disappointed again. Feeling like a failure because all your friends can have babies, what's wrong with me? OR the feeling I am well aware of... being so excited that you finally got a positive! Only to go to the doctor and hear the stomach wrenching sound of the silent, lifeless ultrasound... no heart beat, being told the baby is there, but the heart has stopped. The baby is gone. Seeing the sweet baby, still in the sack, exactly as you see in pictures on the internet, and knowing that the baby that was there, is now gone. But to experience that heartbreak over and over is a feeling I can never imagine. I feel for these women, I know the struggle is real, the pain is physical, and the disappointment is like nothing else.


I also know the struggle of a difficult, but successful, pregnancy. I know my pregnancies are not the worst. I know some mothers have much more difficult experiences them I do. But I know for me, pregnancy is HARD, painful, and quite honestly, miserable the majority of the time! BUT that does not mean I do not love my children, that does not mean that I am ungrateful that I get to be pregnant, and have happy, healthy children.  


I think it is safe to say that most the time, when a woman "complains about pregnancy" she is not complaining because she is having a child, its not because she is mad she got pregnant, or that she does not want the child. Its because planned or unplanned, pregnancy is hard! It takes a different toll on everyone's bodies. Some are hospitalized, put on bed rest, some are experience incredible emotional challenges, some experience intense physical pain that does not go away, EVER. Some cannot eat, drink, smell or look at certain things without their lunch coming back up for a second, third or thirteenth time! And all of this is 100% out of our control.


As mothers, it's not that we want to get pregnant so we can be miserable. I don't even think those who are experiencing infertility want to get pregnant so they can be in pain. I've never heard someone say "I miss morning sickness", "I miss the terrible pain I was in" or even, "I cannot wait to be pregnant so I can spend 9 months completely uncomfortable". People don't get pregnant to experience the side effects of it. We all get pregnant for the same reason, to have a baby.


I would go through every day, minute, second of this painful journey again and again if that means I get my babies, but that's not why I get pregnant. When someone complains "about pregnancy" I think it is important to remember... they are not complaining because in a few short months they get to hold this incredible human that they created. They are not upset that they get to lay in bed at night and feel those little baby kicks inside their stomach. They are not mad that they have to be pregnant. Its not that they do not want the baby. They realize that "they could have prevented this", but that does not discount their feelings, or make their struggle of a difficult journey any less valid then the mother who prays for the same end result.


I'm happy that I get to be pregnant, I'm grateful I've experienced only one miscarriage. I'm grateful for my happy, healthy babies. But I didn't get pregnant to be in pain. I didn't choose to have difficult pregnancies, just like some women don't choose to experience infertility.


I think what is important for everyone to remember, is that regardless of your journey or your struggle, everyone struggles. Everyone has challenges and trials, and not one of them asked for that trial. We all need to be empathetic to each other. While you may not fully comprehend what another person is feeling or going through, realize that to them, in that moment, that challenge is as important to them, as your challenge is to you.  


You can do it if AshHas!!

Thursday, April 4, 2013

TUTU for Sale

I am thinking about starting a shop of some sort where I sell tutus, and a bunch of other stuff. For now, I am starting with just tutus! 

I have the following tutus available for purchase. If you are interested in any please contact me. (see the Keep in Touch page for my contact info)

 3 layer Hot Pink Ballet Tutu - $7
Fits 6 months to 10 years of age
12 inches long
Soft, full, adorable

3 layer Turquoise Ballet Tutu - $7
Fits 6 months to 10 years of age
12 inches long
Soft, full, adorable 

 3 layer Zebra and Hot Pink Ballet Tutu - $7
Fits 6 months to 10 years of age
12 inches long
Soft, full, adorable 
1 layer Zebra, 2 layers Hot pink

Reversible Hot Pink and Purple Ballet Tutu - $8
Fits 6 months to 10 years of age
12 inches long
Soft, full, adorable
Completely reversible - 2 skirts in one

Light Pink Sparkle Tutu - $8
Fits 6 months to 10 years of age
12 inches long
Soft, full, adorable
1 layer pink sparkle, 2 layers pink

3 layer Cheetah Light Pink Long Ballet Tutu - $8
Fits waists 16'' to 34''
Large sized Ballet Tutu
Soft, full, adorable

Purple or Black Fiber Optic Tutu - $9
Light up tutu - on and off switch for extra fun

Hot Pink Leotard - $6
X-Large - fits 8-10 year old
shoulder to hip 14 inches.
neck to crotch 16.5 inches.
chest 12 inches.
measurements unstretched.

You can do it, if AshHas!

Thursday, March 28, 2013

Hole Filler!

Warning, I am not in any way, shape, or form a professional hole filler. See, I dont even know what its called! This is not intended to guide or teach the right way to do this. This is just what I did, and it looks good, so I would say I didn't do too bad.

Behind this piece of wood is a big hole! No, that is now how I filled the hole. Good idea though, just cover it then no one knows! lol

So I removed the wood and look what it looks like... yucky!

While I was filling this I would not let #1(my oldest daughter) in the bathroom or she would have freaked out! She is terrified of holes, she is convinced that there are monsters in any and all holes, so to prevent a melt down, I blocked the bathroom off until I was done! lol (should have taken a pic of it! Oh well!)

So I put this mesh tape stuff up,  over the hole, and then caked the mud on (actually it was spackel). Waiting for it to dry, took FOREVER! I have the kind that goes on pink and when it turns white it is dry. I did this at like 7pm. I was not ready until about 2pm the next day!  I used a LOT!

Finally it dried, and I sanded the crap out of it to make it feel smooth. I think there is a step that you make it kind of textured(ish) I did not have the stuff for that, so I skipped it. Oh well!

Put a couple coats of primer, paint and done!

Not too difficult! AND it does not look too bad!
What did I miss? Besides getting the hole filler license part?

You can do it, if AshHas

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

The CHEAPEST Bathroom Redo Ever!!!

I am SO beyond excited about my "new" bathroom! I have been itching to redo it for so long now, bug I just keep putting it off because I really want a new countertop, and kinda wanted to do it all at once.

(I really wish I knew where my camera memory card thing is... I have had to take the pics on my phone, so they are not so great! My bathroom really is gorgeous now, but the pics don't do justice!)

Well, I was sitting at home the other day and decided I would just go for it! I had NO idea what I wanted to do. Well I had a little idea, but not enough for me to start a project. I am a HUGE planner, maybe it is more I am just scared to do something permanent.  I have to draw it out, think about it for a few weeks, draw it again, prepare all the stuff... then MAYBE I would get started.  I am very timid when it comes to making big changes. I am afraid it will look bad and then I have to start over... And I HATE painting!

So....... I had a bunch of paint left over from past painting projects, enough to paint the bathroom. I wanted something different then all the walls one color, or a solid accent wall. I also have always wanted to try stripes, so that is what I did. I'll write a post about stripes later.

This project cost me less then $30! Not even kidding! I had the paint, tape, the baseboard, a couple rollers, paint pans, and all the decorations. I did need to buy another paint roller, and pan(which now I have a couple left over for another project), and I also bought a new shower curtain rod and shower liner.

Started by ripping the linoleum off the walls. Instead of baseboard there was linoleum on the walls. I like the look of baseboard better. I then filled the holes and waited for the spackel to dry... I HATE WAITING! Finally, once the spackel turned white I sanded it.

I primed the walls 2 times. I did not have a lot of paint to do several coats, and I had primer, so I primed them. Again, waited for that to dry. Finally I was ready to paint. Threw up a coat of paint... and oh ya, waited again!

I cut and applied the baseboard, cleaned up, decorated, and I now have a beautiful new bathroom! I seriously love it!

Projects I still want to do in here...

* new sink

* new faucet

* possibly refinish the cabinets black
* put a frame around the mirror
* new countertop
(ya, kinda like this!)
 * eventually new flooring

However in the meantime, this will do! I love it. What do you think?

Friday, March 22, 2013

Easter Shelf

Today I present to you my completed Easter Shelf! For each holiday/season,  I decorate this shelf and today, I will show you my Easter shelf!

I like it! What do you think? I have my banner that you can learn about HERE, and the printable that I made, you can read about it HERE, or download the printable HERE

 The stuff on the shelf, I am not going to do any individual post about. I bought them from a place in Orem Utah called Crafty Wood Cutouts, HERE is their website, and HERE is the link to the Easter decor on their site. You can shop and order products right on their website, or you can go to their store!
I bought all the paper for these projects from Joann Fabrics, buttons from Hobby Lobby, and I already had the tulle and paint. 

If  you have any questions about how to do any of these projects feel free to let me know! 

What do your Easter mantels, decorations look like? What fun things did you make for Easter?

You can do it, if AshHas!

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Spring/ Easter Banner

So.... I really want to start working out on a regular basis, but I have no motivation. I have things that SHOULD motivate me, but they don't. What really got you motivated? Any one want to be my workout buddy, that usually helps!?

I found this really great blog, The girl puts up free workouts that you can watch and follow along, or just read about and do yourself. She is adorable, and I would love to steal her body and put my head on it. Well maybe I will just steal all of her. I think she is beautiful! Anyway, I was sitting at home last night and the hubby was at work, the girls were asleep and decided I would try one... The videos are about 17 min long and you can just start it over and do it as many times as you want. Well, I did not even make it through the whole video before I gave up... Seriously! I could not do it for 17 min!? Really!? But yet, I still don't want to do it... and the mini me on my other shoulder is telling me I should...

I watched The Biggest Loser this season, and the Finale was the other night. OMG Danni, Lisa and Joe looked AMAZING, hard work does pay off and in the end it will be worth it. I know that! BUT how do you motivate yourself to put mind over matter and just do it!? If you figure it out, let me know!

Anyway, on to todays post... an Easter or Spring (or Christmas, or fall, or Halloween, or 4th of July, or...) banner...

This is a really simple project. It took me less then 30 min to do, all you need is card stock, ribbon or tulle and something to poke holes with. I got a hole punch from Joann Fabrics, it punches cute little rectangle holes. It was $5.99 and I used the 40% off coupon!

All you have to do is cut your shapes out (you can do circles, triangles, these square type deals, whatever shape you want), punch holes, thread and tie your ribbon or tulle, and your done.
So simple, but so cute! This banner adds such a cute flair to any room or party, and you can make one for any season!

You can do it, if AshHas

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

FIRST and FREE Easter Printable

I usually download someone else's already created printable for my holiday shelf, however for my Easter shelf, I wanted the printable to be landscape instead of portrait, and could not find any that were portrait.

I thought, just how hard could it be to make one? So, here is my version of an Easter printable. You are all welcome to download it and use it, if you want.

Here it is in my frame...

Click here or on the photo below to download the free printable! Enjoy!

You can do it, if AshHas!